We have to keep this in mind. A narcissist is like speaking to a tree. A tree is convinced its a tree. But what if the tree was really a bush but the bush just thought it was a tree?
Some narcissists insist they are kind, wonderful human beings. They are unaware they are not trees--they are NOT kind and they are not LOVING. Instead they are self-absorbed and only exhibit kind and loving behaviors when it SUITS THEM.
They are only able to appear to be kind and loving when doing so helps make THEM look good.
Beware of the wolf in grandma's clothing, who smells like warm baked apple pie. They may have tears in their eyes, gifts in their arms and look like sheep, but before long, you'll begin to feel like you've got claws in your back.
The shy vulnerable narcissist is the person who uses a sob story to lure you into their lair of emotional doom! They will...
Emotional abuse is invisible but it packs a punch to our nonphysical systems like our mental, emotional, and spiritual selves.
Abuse is defined as any action designed to cause another person harm.
Emotional abuse is used as a means to gain entry inside someone's mind. When an abuser has gained enough power over their victims, the abuser does not have to work as hard to gain control.
Learned helplessness is a state in which victims learn to believe there is no way out. Fighting back has proven futile and often, exasperated abuse.
Dark personalities push for the day when they have successfully nudged their victims over the learned helplessness finish line. Past this line, is an invisible dungeon where the mental bodies of the victim and the abuser live. No one else can see this dungeon which makes the abuse victim feel lost, forgotten, and powerless.
Hope is the golden milk abuse survivors need in order to peel off the shame, fear, and confusion caused by emotional abuse long enough to...
Have you ever known someone who hurt you just because you did not see things their way?
Have you ever been threatened emotionally, financially or physically by someone?
This is called exploitation and we all need to know the warning signs so we can enforce boundaries and avoid being hurt by those who believe they have a right to harm another.
Not one of us has ever been put on planet earth to suffer the abuse of another person.
We may not know this in our gut, and we won't if as children we were treated with little to no regard.
It is time to hold onto the self and to know the self as divine, worthy and valid!
From there, we consciously recognize the need to protect ourselves from predator personalities because, HELLO, they do freaking exist. And sadly sometimes they are the ones who have been endowed to protect us!
I am not saying we need to live in fear...I am saying we need to live CONSCIOUSLY and AWARE.
There is no need to hate anyone...but we do need to love the self and honor what we...
If you struggle with codependency, you struggle with having a healthy autonomous identity.
When asked the question, "Who are you?" you answer according to your roles in society, or you describe yourself according to ideas that have shaped your perception of self. You speak in terms of what has happened to you or in terms of what role you think you play in the world or in your family.
You say things like;
I am a woman.
I am a man.
I am a father.
I am a mother.
I am a soccer coach.
I am a doctor.
I am a writer.
I am someone with a disability.
I am depressed.
I am anxious.
I am a bus driver.
I am an electrician.
I am a hairdresser.
I am the daughter of a narcissist.
I am the adult child of an alcoholic.
I am a sexual abuse survivor and so on...
While all of these statements might very well be true for you, the truth is, they do not describe who you are separate from what has happened to you or what role your culture or our very imperfect, still chaotic society has placed you into.
Many of us are still...
When you are codependent you often tolerate aspects of relationships healthier people would not. You may people-please, react, coerce, enable, deny, enmesh, and violate boundaries. You may be clinging to a relationship rather than letting go because you fear being alone. Perhaps you find a sense of value in the taking care of others and doubt you are worthy of a truly healthy relationship.
When we are breaking free from codependency we are learning to be patient with our process of healing. Much of our recovery will rely on our ability to be humble and self-analyzing. As we learn to see things in ourselves we do not necessarily like, we may be tempted to run and hide. It takes great courage to look in the mirror and to acknowledge there is something about ourselves we must change.
Remember to be patient and kind with the self as you learn to understand why you may have developed codependency. Healing the wounded heart takes time and much dedication to personal...
People will say that you do not need to fear a narcissist.
I say fear is God's way of saying, "Pay freaking attention -- there is a dark spirit in your midsts."
People who do not have a mind that operates to be a part of the whole, work to destroy the whole so they can remain in control of all who make up the whole.
Narcissists are persecutors, but their mind will insist that you are the persecutor and they are the victim.
Be careful out there Dear Ones...
God isn't going to sit at your coffee table and tell you to 'wake up'. No, God speaks to us through our gut instincts.
It is our job to learn to be still -- and to consciously make contact with our Higher Self; our Holy Spirit Self.
When we heal the programs in our heads that make us feel not enough, we can more clearly hear the voice of Spirit and Wisdom guiding us and cautioning us to love and protect the self.
One of the emotions many codependents rely on to help us feel less powerless is resentment.
When we are angry at someone who has not done what we think they should have, and often when our own abandonment traumas have been triggered, our minds can rear off into the land of punishment and vindictiveness. The more VALUE we have placed on someone or on the relationship, the more RESENTFUL we are when that person does not behave the way we think they should have.
But here is the problem…resentment and vindictiveness keeps us stuck and repeating patterns of thought that reinforce our feelings of victimhood. While we are lashing out, we are essentially telling the universe that this other person hurt us and we are pissed off because we have been victimized in some way.
In a nutshell, we are telling the universe—“I AM A VICTIM—see how angry I am—see how pissed off I am—see how much power this person has over me—I have NO power myself—I have no...
Narcissists use word salads, deflection, fear, intimidation, projections, lying, denying and other forms of manipulative tactics to keep you stuck.
Please enjoy this video to learn more and to hopefully help you understand why you might be confused after dating a narcissist.
Lisa A. Romano is a Certified Life Coach, bestselling author, and YouTube Vlogger specializing in codependency and narcissistic abuse recovery. She is also one of the most listened to meditation teachers on the world’s largest meditation app Insight Timer. Lisa creates real-life tools to help people evolve past their traumas so they can live in peace, achieve success, and create harmony in their lives regardless of painful past events.
Lisa's work helps awaken people to the idea that what is wrong is not them, it is only their programming. Her 12 Week Breakthrough Healing Coaching Program takes members through three months of...