Narcissism exists on a spectrum and it is considered a personality trait. When someone is considered to be narcissistic, we can assume this person is grandiose, self absorbed and in love with the facade they wish others to admire, cater to, fawn after, and succumb to.
Covert narcissists are those who carry around the ‘woe is me’ attitude. They may appear as vulnerable, helpful, and even altruistic. On the inside, this person will harbor resentment, feelings of anger, and become vengeful when others do not give into their demands. Vibrationally, they feel as if the world owes them. Relationships come down to what you can offer them. If it is attention they require, you will be roped into melodrama whether real or imagined. If you do not offer them what they demand, you will be punished in some way. They are distrustful, exploitive, and entitled. Making ...
So much chaos happens inside the mind, body, and soul of a child when they are shamed for having emotions or negative reactions to how someone treats them.
When a child is shamed, they are forced to detach from the wound that caused their emotional reaction.
When they notice that mother or father, teacher, or some other authority is displeased with their emotional reaction, they let go of the very experience that has wounded them, in fear of further abandonment.
The unexperienced experience sits and rots over time. It never goes away.
Shaming a child causes them to detach and dissociate from the very essence of themselves that is necessary to help them navigate their lives in the directions of their fullest potential.
When a child is shamed, they are denied access to this potential and often, it is not until after much chaos in the adult life does this wounded inner child ever scream loud enough to be heard.
Shame forces the inner child to detach from the wonder that they are.
The moments we remember the most are the ones that have
defined us and helped shape who and what we become.
Our most painful moments are the ones that break us in some
way. They rip the world from beneath our feet and cause us to
feel like we are free floating in an abyss. We can become
terrified, arrested in fear and lose our sense of safety.
In my life, I have come to realize all those moments were
opportunities to let pain out and let love in. I have had many experiences break me more times than I’d like to recall, however, upon reflection, the moments that broke me were chances to become as tough as steel.
Every time my heart was broken, I had the opportunity to let go
of the fear that caused me to cling to something that did not
serve me, and learn to rely more on the love within.
Now I know that when I was breaking I was actually experiencing awakening.
If humans could shutty-shutty, and just for 10 minutes a day, we could all live a more joyful life.
If we were all conditioned to PAUSE and reflect rather than feel the need to REACT to every emotion our brain noticed pass through our conscious field, we could all learn to have SUPER COMPUTERS for brains.
The reactive brain is a lizard brain and it DOES NOT have to be this way.
Emotions are indicators not facts.
Facts are facts and although how we feel is also a fact, we have the ability to think before we speak and to even CHANGE our emotions.
WHY would we want to change how we feel?
If I feel unworthy and the fact is my parents went out of their way to tear me down rather than build me up, my feelings around unworthiness are valid and they are REAL, but it is NOT a fact that I am unworthy.
Emotions need NOT be seen as things that are set in stone.
Yes, all emotions are valid and why we feel a certain way is valid too, but, the rational or the cause of why we feel the way we do may not be...
Emotional Sobriety is a gift and it is what we should all be striving for.
When we are emotionally sober, we are not reactive, impulsive, or lost in a sea of survival mechanisms. We are deliberate in our thoughts, actions, and intentions. We do what we can to avoid thinking that is rooted in lack. We learn to honor what we have been through in the past, acknowledging that the power to overcome is a sure thing!
Healing from the past is definitely tricky, BUT, understanding it is POSSIBLE certainly brings us HOPE, as we become more aware of what has been holding us back.
Choosing to think a healing thought over a self-limiting thought is one of the most courageous things we can do. When we do, we invoke the same energies that have created universes!
Do not let the past keep you off-balance any longer!
FULLY EMBODY your FREE-WILL and let NO ONE or NO THOUGHT prevent you from merging with the DIVINE HEART and the SPIRIT you are!
You got this!
1) Emotional abuse causes you to believe that you are the reason other people are angry, sad, or unhappy. Narcissists cause you to believe you are responsible for the way they feel.
2) Emotional manipulation that is rooted in switching the tables. Narcissists violate you and then when you complain or address their abuse, they switch the tables and are angry at you for being angry at them.
3) Gaslighting is a form of narcissistic abuse that will cause the victims to doubt their perception of reality. Narcissists can also minimize your accomplishments, downplay your successes and or lie about events causing you to doubt your perceptions.
4) Exploitation is a form of narcissistic abuse that involves exploiting the kindness,...
It is so wonderful to feel heard, loved, and respected. We all want it, but why are so many of us unable to achieve this amazing standard in our relationships?
If you come from a less than perfect childhood, you may have never felt understood and today, you may want more than anything to be heard. Unfortunately, many of us from imperfect homes tend to attract partners who are very similar to the people who wounded us. The brain prefers the familiar and the personality feels attracted to what it knows. This is great news if you came from an awesome home, but if not, it is time to up your consciousness.
If you are someone who tends to make excuses for bad behavior, or if you are someone who tends to have become desensitized to other people’s abuse, chances are you probably never felt heard in childhood. You may still be wanting and expecting the people you love to hear you.
If this sounds like you, it is time YOU start to see YOU!
Begin by taking an inventory of how often you...
When a being decides they need to make adjustments in their life, they often do not realize that the adjustments they are seeking will require change. Many beings struggle with the idea of change--yet there is nothing that is--that is not in a constant state of flux.
When you are involved in a dysfunctional dynamic--growth--independence--accountability and self reliance are unwelcome notions. Dysfunctional dynamics generally follow certain invisible guidelines. Relationships that are unhealthy are dishonest. They are about power and control--which includes power and control over how others feel.
A client of mine was recently diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. After talking in length about his family of origin, he revealed that while growing up--his father was totalitarian--and his mother was enabling. His father beat him routinely and made it crushingly obvious that he was disappointed with my client, as he did not wish to go into the family business. At family dinners my clients...