All problems are the result of one's interpretations of a particular situation. Deeper, all problems are the result of our attachments to a particular outcome we have egotistically presumed is the proper and only correct outcome. Deeper, all pain in this world is the result of a being who falsely presumes their happiness is dependent upon something or someone outside of itself they cannot realistically control.
Happiness then can only come by way of letting go of our ideas of attachment. When one intellectually or emotionally attaches to an outcome, they have unknowingly pinched themselves off from freedom. By placing our happiness on outcomes, people, situations and experiences outside of ourselves, we cut ourselves off from the joy we think we were after in the first place.
You are reading this, but you may not be in control of the thoughts that are popping into your head as you read it. You may not even be aware that you have control over the thoughts that are showing up in your...
Love is a choice and a state of being.
Love is an action word as it reflects a nonphysical state that is acted upon by a physical being.
To help us understand what love truly is, it helps to rest one’s mind on the simplicity that abounds in nature.
Today, focus your attention on the beauty of a single flower. Study it. Watch it. Imagine what it feels like to be a single rose or sunflower in a garden of many in a world it does not worry about, unconcerned with what the other sunflowers or roses think.
Do what you can to imagine and connect on a vibrational level to the absolute stillness of that flower.
Just for a few moments, drop your own mind. Drop your thoughts. Drop your worries over your past wounding experiences. Drop your worry and connect to the infinite streams of abundance that is always--and was always about you.
Just for a few moments, become still of mind and milk the experience of love. Milk the feeling of pure acceptance, peace, and stillness that is love.
The life of the adult child of an alcoholic as well as for the alcoholic or any being who believes they are powerless over their current states of mind, are all living a paradox.
It is right to presume that all beings created--desire to be loved, accepted, and validated for the essence of who they are. And yet in spite of this yearning to be loved, ACoA's, alcoholics, addicts and the victims of abuse deny themselves the love they yearn.
The greatest dis-ease of man today is that man does not love self--the self that is separate from his illusion of ego.
When beings identify their worth by physical things found in the so called physical reality, man--through thought separates himself from the very thing he yearns for.
It is not possible to find the love a being searches for in a car, a home, a dress size, a business, or a bank account. It is not possible to find acceptance when that acceptance is being judged by some kind of ruler.
Acceptance just is--no matter what.
All human children require connection and to be attuned to loving parents and caretakers and when that does not happen there is a dis-order in the natural evolutionary process of the human being.
This is not OUR fault. LOVE is a requirement for a healthy life.
LOVE is required for healthy brain growth, and the ability to trust others as well as the self.
If you have been abused since childhood, codependency, low self-worth, shame, guilt, anxiety, the inability to trust yourself and others are symptoms of LOVE DEFICIT DISORDER!
If you suffer from self-love deficit that’s because you FIRST suffered LOVE DEFICIT DISORDER and that is not your fault.
It is my hope, that as human consciousness expands, so does the understanding of the cause of symptoms rather than just focusing on the outcomes of causes.
Codependency is a symptom and it has definitive causative agents--none of which are the fault of the one suffering from codependency.
How many of you believe that the root of most...
Enlightenment implies we were once in the dark.
To be enlightened is to come out of the darkness within. Fear equals darkness. Darkness is fear and yet, we are the light and at our deepest truth we have NO THING to fear because we are enough.
Fear is the result of conditioning and childhood programming. While fear that is related to being hit by a truck as we walk across a busy city street is healthy and necessary, fearing being alone or being ostracized to the point of panic and overwhelming doom is NOT healthy.
Healing from emotional fears related to trauma IS THE HEROES JOURNEY because NO ONE can face the darkness within and overcome it but the one in the dark.
1) Wake up every morning and declare ‘I am enough’
2) In your mind turn to your inner child and say ‘It is not your fault you fear abandonment-you have been abandoned’
3) Visualize yourself hugging your inner child and say to them, ‘I am so sorry you have been abandoned-please forgive me...
Namaste Dear Ones!
Nobody ever tells us this, but they should. On the path to emotional sobriety, we will be faced with ALL OF OUR FEARS! Our ego will be challenged and every one of our wounds will be activated. We will be confronted with choices we once prayed we'd never have to make.
Will we choose them, or will we choose ourselves?
Will we stay quiet, or will be rock the boat?
Will we stay, or will we walk away?
Will we react and lash out, or will we surrender and accept what we cannot change?
Will we people-please, fawn and dissociate, or will we walk through the fear of making changes that will require us to face our fear of being alone?
Lions and frikin' tigers and bears--OH MY!
The road to recovery and healing from codependency is a path to enlightenment.
When we suffer from the fear of abandonment, we do not realize we are living below the veil of consciousness as ego clings tightly to conditioned behaviors it was powerless to control while...
Ego is that aspect of our personality that has been designed to negotiate the innate needs and impulses of the inner child with the outside world. We may have times where we want to scream or curse someone out, but our ego may realize this is not socially acceptable or ethically responsible.
The ego will work to protect the inner child from further injury. Some of us have been conditioned to tone ourselves down to avoid additional pain, while others have learned to lash out at others as a way to teach others to back off so to avoid further emotional pain.
Neither is healthy.
What is important to acknowledge is that enlightenment requires a letting go and the release of the need to shut down or lash out. When faced with the choice to let go, ego will feel threatened and to the unaware mind, this threat will cause a crisis.
The enlightened mind will look within and change in self what needs to be changed for the purpose of peace on the outside as well as on the inside. A young...
The only thing we can create are those things we believe in and the opposite is true as well.
No one can create what they do not believe is possible to create.
When I think about my mom, who spent over 50 years appeasing a narcissist whose agenda it was to keep her small, afraid, in check, and to himself, a fire ignites in the pit of my soul.
When I think about the sexual abuse my mother endured as a child, and how it was never spoken about, my teeth clench.
When I think about my mother's father domestically abusing my grandmother, I have to close my eyes and take deep breaths.
When I think about my grandmother showing up drunk and with a wet head, with mascara dripping down her face at my mother's wedding, I have to try not to crawl out of my skin.
When I think about my mother's last year of life, and I remember the callous ways in which my father spoke to her, and I recall the words he used to describe how angry he was with her dementia, I want to scream--and some days I do.