Narcissists are cunning, manipulative and exploitive.
They seek those who are agreeable, kind, empathic, and often in emotional pain to dominate and control. It is never the fault of someone whose emotions were exploited by a narcissist, when they find their minds have been scrambled like eggs by a predatory type personality, period!
Gaslighting is utter abuse at every possible level.
A narcissist will gain your trust, draw you in, become everything they have learned YOU need, and once you are dependent upon them for all of your emotional needs, they've got YOU!
A narcissist will brainwash you over time to believe that YOU are the one with the problem. Since they have convinced you -- you should trust them, you do, but what you don't see is how they, at the same time have manipulated you to feel insecure about your thoughts, feelings, perceptions and decisions.
Double Jeopardy has begun!