When Love Goes In Love Comes Out

As adults, we tend to get stuck in the mire of the problems of the moment. If we are depressed, resentful, sad, disempowered, and just plain stuck, we rarely lift our heads in curiosity and simply ask 'Why?'

If you have been mistreated, neglected, and have suffered abuse, it is not your fault if misery has become a faithful companion.

What goes in comes out.

As it is below so shall it be above.

When love and acceptance go in, we feel the love and acceptance of self.

When fear, hate, and abuse go in, we feel these energies within us.

It is not our fault if when as innocent, powerless beings dysfunctional authority figures infected us with their negative energies.

However, today, as free will thinking adults, we have the potential and the right to heal our lives through the raising of our consciousness, the learning of new programs, and the acting upon truth.

You were never not enough.

Within you is the power to change what goes in so you can change what comes out.

All my love!

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Social Media and External Validation: The Pitfalls

Brene Brown has stated, “I carry a small piece of paper in my wallet of the names of people whose opinions matter. To be on that list, you have to love me for my strengths and my struggles.”

The world has become taken over by Social Media and while I believe the POWER to connect with people from all over the world is purely magical, I can’t help but acknowledge the DARK side of social media as well.

When our entire reason for living comes down to who and how many people like a pic or a post we post to a social media site, we’ve crossed the line. Social media can be addicting and if we are not careful, we can lose all sense of balance while participating in online forums. From political and religious differences to stalking the ex or to being stalked by the ex, to family feuds that get hashed out on virtual forums, the FEAR of what other people think is EVERYWHERE.

It is important to make sure we CHECK ourselves and we don’t lose all the hard work we have...
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Divorcing a Covert Narcissist

 

 

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Verbal Abuse Hurts as Much as Physical Abuse

What goes in sticks.

What goes in must come out.

Verbal abuse as a child is impressed upon the subconscious mind and in time becomes what the ego fears and the inner critic spits back.

Verbal abuse is akin to taking a bat to the mind and heart of a child. Some of the worst abuse committed upon children is done through airwaves.

If you verbally abuse yourself, you’re not crazy. There is a reason.

The wonderful news is you can reprogram the tongue of the inner critic if you can assure the ego it’s safe to let go.

Refuse to abuse YOU any longer!

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10 Mind Games Narcissists Play

 

Narcissists have shadows as we all do but unlike healthier others, they are unable to experience self-awareness or self-realization. Their minds work to ward off seeing themselves and all their character flaws for what they are.

If they are liars, they will never see themselves as such or they will rationalize why they abuse you, deceive you and continue to take from you.

If they steal from you, they will not see it as stealing. Instead, they will rationalize why they are entitled to take from you without having to give to you.

They will tell themselves a story that prevents them from understanding how their selfish, self-serving behaviors are acceptable.

They will never admit that they lie, cheat, or steal. Their minds will always justify why they have done what they have done.

They will never see you as a victim of their personality disorder. Instead, they will forever view themselves as a victim, fail to take accountability and as soon as they are done with you, they are on to...

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Wounded Adults -- Children Stuck in Time -- Healing our Dependency Upon Others -- Lisa A Romano

When we are codependent we do not realize that our sense of balance, peace, safety, and identity is reliant upon someone or something outside of us.

We are 'attached' to the idea that someone or something or some experience is responsible for our happiness or unhappiness.

It could be our looks, our weight, our hair, our career, our standing in a church, community or organization -- it could be our relationship status -- it could be a spouse -- a child -- friends -- a boss -- coworker -- or a career we falsely presume is the source of our happiness or identity or our misery.

When we are codependent, our ideas are confused and our neural pathways are short. We do not realize we are children in adult bodies and suffering from decades of abandonment.

We are in the habit of abandoning the self, the inner child, our bodies, and stay stuck in loops of dysfunctional reactionary behavior.

We make other people our God or our executioner and we are unaware as to the power we hold within...

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Love Addiction -- No More Chasing Love -- Lisa A Romano

Love addiction is intoxicating. It is also catastrophic as it is built upon the broken bones of a wounded inner child.

When we have come from homes that have caused us to question our worth as human beings because those who loved us have missed the mark by failing to appreciate how crucial it was for children to FEEL seen, wanted, and understood, a great gaping hole forms in our soul. This hole aches to be filled and behaves like a vacuum for what the ego believes will fill it.

The ego is immature. Its concepts about love are childlike. Ego is under the illusion that fairy-tale-like love will fill this void and allow the being that we are to finally feel FULL, WHOLE, and ENOUGH. Ego operates with limited understandings. It does not know about addiction. It does not understand that groveling, obsessing, and begging are behaviors that are tied to our initial abandonment. Ego only knows pain vs pleasure and with its limited understanding about love, believes a fairy-tale is what it...

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Motivation to Never Give Up Striving to Heal from Codependency

Twenty years ago, my children and I were living in the eye of a messy emotional tornado. The fringes of our family unit were coming undone and my ex-husband and I were cracking under the pressure of over a decade of unresolved b/s.

When you decide to change your life by ending a marriage and especially when you have children, the angst of the innumerable unknowns rattles your brain. Times like the holidays become feared and many of us discover we white-knuckle it until January 2nd.

When you are in the midst of change, you don't know that your brain is hyper-aware because it is trying to protect you and that it feels unsafe in unknown waters. All you know is you feel terrified.

For years my body, mind, soul, and even my children paid the price for my unconsciousness. I did not know I was codependent, feared abandonment, and felt powerless. Two decades ago if you would have suggested I was insecure, felt powerless, and expected others to offer me a sense of worth through my catering...

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Why Narcissists MUST Use Love Bombing to Control Their Victims

 

Love bombing is an emotional and psychological weapon narcissists must rely on in order to gain access to the inner and sacred parts of their victims where they will do the most damage. 

Imagine the president of a major bank, who knew the ins and outs of the bank's security system robbing the bank. Because the president of the bank was trusted by all, they were able to steal from the bank with ease. 

Narcissists use love bombing to gain their victim's trust. As victims of narcissistic abuse become more trusting of the narcissist, the narcissist is able to do the most damage. In time, narcissistic abuse victims will distrust their emotions, ideas, beliefs, and thoughts. The narcissist will do all they can to brainwash their victims into submission. 

It is my hope, this podcast helps anyone out there who is suffering from narcissistic abuse, learn to understand why narcissists must use love bombing as a tool to manipulate those they target. 

Lisa A. Romano is a...
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