Oct 10, 2018

I Don't Feel Good Enough Syndrome

by Lisa A. Romano

low self-esteem not enough

The truth is you are enough BUT emotionally unintelligent, abusive, self-absorbed, immature parents may have conditioned you to believe you are not enough.

Maybe it was the way they made everything about them, or maybe it was the way they judged you, ignored you, criticized you, argued in front of you, abused one another, your siblings, or you.

Whether neglect is overt or covert, on purpose or is the byproduct of ignorance or unconsciousness, the effects are the same.

We grow up detached from a healthy sense of self and believe we are not good enough.

The reality is, it is very simple to traumatize a child and program them to believe they are not enough. As adults, this one lie becomes the blueprint we build our lives upon. When we go for interviews, on dates, meet new people or go to a party, in the back of our minds we feel not good enough.

This shame is so intense, we set out to unconsciously squash it by pretending to others that we are happy, content and that our lives are perfect. Because we have been taught that what other people think about us is far more important than what we think about us, we are stuck perpetuating a lie.

We feel not enough and our lives then become endless attempts to have someone out there tell us we are enough while we pretend to think we are.

What a tangled web we weave when 'I am not enough' is what we believe.

Buck the lie Dear One!