If people looked more like animals, it would be easy to know who to avoid.
If manipulative, abusive, narcissistic people looked like lions, tigers or bears, most of us would avoid them. But, abusive people look like regular people and many narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths are wonderfully charming when we first meet them.
Many of the most damaging people out there are the ones who don’t look like evil people. Many are wolves in sheep's clothing whose energy feels more like carbon monoxide than clean air. The abuse they cause is invisible and debilitating. We don't know we are dealing with lions or wolves because we cannot see them clawing at our hearts or gnawing at our skin. The ick we feel is internal and sadly, manipulative people are so good at convincing you that YOU are the problem, it can take a lifetime to understand the ick is really not you--and it is a symptom of living with someone who sees others as toys they use to entertain their egos, whether the ego is up or down.
A narcissist is like a big cat with a ball of yarn. You are there for their enjoyment. If they are bored they'll play with you. If they are angry they will play with you. If they are no longer amused by you, they will discard you.
Love does not feel like a game of cat and mouse nor does it feel like a roller coaster or crack-cocaine high.
Love is consistent, patient, tender, reliable, expandable, supportive, empathic, considerate, tolerable, and kind.
When we are on the spiritual path, we all must learn the lesson of loving the self and part of loving the self is paying attention to how people treat us.
If you know people who don’t play fair, pay attention.
No, you don’t have to throw the baby out with the bath water all the time, but certainly learning to pull your sacred energy from relationships that drain or hurt you is a wise thing to do.
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The Road Back to Me
Codependent Now What-It's Not You-It's Your Programming
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