Love Addiction Sucks!
by Lisa A. Romano
Love addiction sucks!
If you are the kind of person that obsesses over love interests, then you know what it feels like to feel totally OUT OF CONTROL!
Have you ever driven past a love interests house dozens of times, hoping they might just ‘happen’ to catch a glimpse of you ‘coincidentally’ passing their house? Have you texted and then texted again, and then texted some more, when your love interest did not text you back? Have you stalked their Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram accounts? Have you stayed up all night fantasizing about who they are with, what they are doing and about why they haven’t called you since breakfast? Does your mind ruminate and worry about what they think about you, your hair, your lips, your car, your dog, your house and so on?
Those of us who have suffered from love addiction must understand that anything that causes us to feel OUT OF CONTROL is NOT good for us—and NO—not even that really, really hot guy that buys his coffee down at Starbucks every morning that we also stalk on his early morning runs because we just so happened to follow him one day after his stop for coffee and noticed he liked to jog at the park a mile from our home.
Of course, this was all happenstance, right?
Love addiction is intoxicating and it is related to our inability to take care of the self. Thinking about another person and fantasizing about them helps us avoid our internal pain. We do not love the self and it feels better to OBSESS about fantasy type love than it does to deal with our own insecurities, and underdeveloped ability to love and care for the self.
Telling ourselves stories about the person we have developed an infatuation with effectively acts to numb our own pain. When we are thinking about another person, and or eventually catering to them inside a relationship dynamic, we get to run away from what is really at the core of our relationship woes.
Until we love the self, we cannot love another person in a healthy way.
Have you ever suffered from love addiction and if so, what was your turning point?
Please share if doing so resonates with you.
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