When Mother's Fail

A child's first protector is its mother and when a mother fails to protect her child from other's abuse and in turn becomes a perpetrator, her child will suffer the greatest human tragedy. The wounds will be invisible. No one will understand the ingredients that make up the child's tears. No one will fathom the heaviness of the child's vibration, and yet, when the child cries or acts out, others will assume what is wrong is the child.

Abuse happens in bedrooms, kitchens, living rooms, and basements when the front doors are locked and the house windows are closed. Family and friends, school personnel and even authorities often dismiss the possibility of abuse, denying their own ignorance and justifying their disbelief based on a subconscious conflict. Often people dismiss abuse as a reality because THEY have not witnessed the abuse, although logical minds understand abuse happens when there are no witnesses to be found.

When mothers fail, every system of a...

The older I get the more humble I become, and the more I appreciate the saying, "Youth is wasted on the young."

The decades I spent chasing, begging, reacting, and pleading to be heard, understood, respected, held, nurtured, and loved are all gone.

The only thing ANY of us have that is worth worrying about is our TIME.

“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men” - Frederick Douglass

Could the chronic illnesses that people face in their adult lives be blamed on the trauma they had to face as children? According to a study published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine titled ‘Relationship of Childhood Abuse and Household Dysfunction to Many of the Leading Causes of Death in Adults’, the answer is yes.

This study showed through scientific testing that abuse or neglect during childhood plays a big role in the development of autoimmune and other chronic diseases. This study was also important as it introduced ACE score, a measure of illnesses caused later in life by ACE (Adverse Childhood Events).

Children’s brain is still developing as they grow. If they are exposed to repeated traumatic experiences, it can weaken the development of their brain’s architecture and cause lifelong physical, mental and behavioral issues.

So if you suffer...

Many adult survivors of traumatic abuse and experiences suffer from memory loss. Although many trauma survivors are able to remember how they felt when they were children, they do not always remember why they felt or feel the way they do today. They may feel like they were abused, but they might not remember precisely why they feel that way.

It is my belief that the more we understand our brains and how they work, the quicker we are able to heal. Not knowing 'the why' drives most human beings crazy. This is because the brain likes resolution and it seems our minds are willing to drive themselves crazy looking for answers. At times our brains will even make up stories to fit what is happening in our lives just to help us 'feel' more in control of what is happening in the now. This is why children assume they are at fault when mommy and daddy abuse them. When the child assumes responsibility for the abuse, the traumatic events make sense to the child's innocent mind. "Mommy beat me...